May 27, 1982
Henderson Production Company, Miller-Milkis Productions, Paramount Television
ABC (television), Paramount Home Video (DVD)
Mork bucks hard for a promotion from leader Orson on planet Ork, and unintentionally comes up with a wild new report on how to stay happily married on Earth. It all starts when Mork decides that the magic ingredients of a successful marriage are the right blend of honesty, respect, romance and compatibility. He buys Mindy a perfectly atrocious mini-outfit with wildly matching shoes, and when he sees her reaction to it, he begins to feel that he would prefer for her to lie and say she loves it. As for respect, while at the apartment with Mindy, Mork and Mearth descend from the attic dressed as huge budding Orkan plants to celebrate their planet's Sacred Foliage Festival. Mindy not only balks at going out to dinner with them dressed that way, but also laughs outright. Mork is upset that she is ridiculing his religion in front of her family. Orson doesn't buy it when Mork, in tux and apron, depicts romance in a passionate dance with Mindy as pots boil over in the kitchen. Mork's last chance backfires when he tries to sell his report on the basis of his and Mindy's perfect compatibility.
Mork calling Orson, come in Orson. Mork calling Orson, come in Orson.... Good evening. I'm Mork Wallace, and I'm Morkie Safer, and I'm Mork Reasoner. Does my hair look good from the back? Welcome to the expanded Mork Report. This year's observer thesis deals with the ever burning question of our time: So, like, how's it going in Mork and Mindy's marriage, k?
This better be good, Mork. Your promotion is riding on it.
Oh, yes, your ton-of-funness. Let's just run it up the flagpole and see if it sits, all right?
Well, I thought Aunt Eunice was very coherent for someone telling anecdotes under sedation.
I still don't understand why a 73-year-old woman would want a nose job.
Well, Fred, I don't know; maybe she got tired of having Cub Scouts asking her if they could hold meetings in it.